In speed dating, you only have maybe 5 minutes to make a favorable impression as well as get to know the woman you are talking to. Now as a man, you may already know (or think you know), whether you want to see this person again based on looks. Yes, looks matter most to men. Women of course are different than men (duhhh!). Although looks matter, they are not the most important thing. And men, I'm sure you know some super hot chicks who are simply poisonous and should be stayed far far way from as well. Speed dating is great - I recommend everyone try it - but not magical. Great questions help a lot, but good overall skills with women are still important, and easily learnable, Two resources I heartily recommend are: * The Tao of Badass * Get a Girlfriend Now Read on for some great speed dating questions and approaches to both create attraction and weed out ones you simply should stay far away from. IMPORTANT: First of all, speed dates are NOT interviews! No one likes being interviewed or questioned, and having a conversation with someone attractive is different! Yes, most people ask the same old boring "Where are you from" and "What do you do for work" type questions. Now some questions like these are OK to mix into your short speed dates, but only because you are trying to find common ground to grow your conversation beyond a mere "exchange of facts." For example, if she's a preschool teacher or a lawyer or seamstress, ask if she likes it and (important) why she likes or doesn't like it. Opinions and feelings are where you want the conversation to go! REMEMBER: Men exchange facts when they communicate - that's why we communicate. Women's primary reason for communication is NOT to exchange mere facts. You need to do more than "just the facts" both to create attraction and to get to know them. That is an important tip to remember. The way I like to do this is by asking power questions, ones that require exchange more than "facts." One great one is "What are you doing to change the world?" (Thanks to Carlos Xuma for that one!). Now you had better have an answer before you ask a question like that and be ready to discuss it! You may not be comfortable with that strong a question, so here are a few more. "What would you love to be doing in 5 years?" Again, you had better have an answer ready yourself to that question. A real answer of course! How about this one, one of my favorites: "If you could wake up anywhere in the world tomorrow and have a day to do whatever you'd like, where would it be?" Can you see how this question demands more than an answer like simply "Manhattan" or "Australia" and how the implicit "why" will invoke feelings, opinions, and emotions? The same questions are also dynamite when meeting women elsewhere too. 5 minutes is not a long time and is the average speed date length! TO SUMMARIZE, A SPEED DATE IS NEITHER AN INTERVIEW, NOR A MERE EXCHANGE OF FACTS. Opinions, feeling, and emotions are where the conversation must quickly go. To attract a woman, you need to ask different questions than the other (mostly boring) men. An awesome approach, one I strongly recommend, is "power questions" like the ones we just discussed! Solid skills with women are as important in speed dating as any other kind of dating.You can learn to be good with women, and two resources I personally love and that have helped me a lot are: * The Tao of Badass * Get a Girlfriend Now
Tuesday 2 August 2011
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